In memory of my beloved only child.
Kristin was very intelligent, loved to read, wrote poetry. She had a beautiful singing voice. Kristin 'felt' for everyone in despair, trouble. She helped anyone she could. She would give her last dime to anyone in need. Kristin had a wonderful sense of humour, quick witted, told the best jokes. She was artistic and was excellent in drawing cartoons.
She loved wearing her jeans or overalls with a T-shirt or sweatshirt. Hair in a ponytail with a baseball cap. She also would WOW everyone when she dressed up.
Looking elegant, beautiful.
Kristin had the most beautiful deep dark brown 'sparkling' eyes. Her smile would light the night.
She was funny. She could laugh at herself. Kristin was sensitive, loving, caring, kind and thoughtful towards others above and beyond.
Kristin loved music. Kris only wanted to be loved, cherished for herself, what was in her heart, not for her external beauty.
When Kris was about 12 years of age, she wanted to become a lawyer. Kris was an honour student always. Kristin could of been whatever she ever dream't of being.
Kristin Alissa or as many of her friends called her Mikale, was the best gift from God I have ever received in my life.
Kristin is the only gift of love I have ever had in my whole life. She was my life. My one true love.
Somehow, along Kristin's path of her life, she made choices that changed her life, her dreams, hopes, desires. Kristins choices also changed Kristin.
From a wonderful, delight. Full of 'light', love, being loved and secure to a beautiful young woman full of insecurities, not believing in herself, feeling unloved.
Kristin's last years here on this earth were filled with despair, fears, anxieties which I as her mother could never reach her with my love.
I never saw my beloved truly laugh, feel loved, look forward to life in her last years on this earth. Sadly, and at times with anguish, anger and despair I had to watch my Kristin make choices on the wrong path in life. Choosing people as friends who only wanted to see Kristin fall, never reach her dreams. Some people on this earth get 'more of a kick' out of watching a so called 'friend' destroy themselves than be a true 'friend' and support, uplift. But, Kristin made her choices. I as her mother had to watch with fear. When Kristin 'got a bee in her bonnet' there was no stopping her.
I ache with despair, pain and emptiness without her in my life. As my only child, Kristin I pray, now truly understands, feels and see's what 'love' truly is and always was and will be for her.
Every waking minute, second of the day I want my Kristin. To feel her arms around me, her smell, her scent of her hair, her kisses. Her laughter, smiles. I miss her wonderful visits having tea with me. Us lighting candles and talking, mother and daughter, together in the wee hours of the night. Talking about her 'love' of her life, Paul. Her only 'true love' no matter. Her ambitions, her dreams. What she wanted to accomplish.
Kristin wanted only to be loved, married, have children, cook, loved to clean for some crazy reason. Be able to watch movies in the evening with her. Her favourites being 'Breakfast At Tiffany's'. Kristin identified herself with this movie. Afraid to really love, in case, she was hurt. She felt'everything' every 'vibe' of people. We would watch once a year 'Gone With The Wind' as a tradition. Just us two. Kristin also loved 'life' itself. On the go, travelling here, there and everywhere. Meeting with friends at restaurants, clubs. Loved being 'on the go'. A busy schedule to Kristin was the 'greatest'.
Kristin gave me a reason for my life.
She gave me faith, hope and strength through my darkest years after separating from her father. She always said, 'mommy, don't worry, we will always have each other'. Yes, we always will have each other. Her heart in my heart. She is with me always, forever.
Kristin is my only 'true love' in this life and always will be.
As her mom, 'ma', I always will be hers.
Until we 'meet again'.
Kristin, thank you for your 'visits' to me since your death and your words of care. Thanks also for the 'games' you play in our home. Dad and I get a real kick out of what you do in the house.